pourquoi?

but even the sun sets in paradise

Why hello Perspective, there you are...

I gotta quit doing this to myself. I mean seriously... what. the. fuck. I got karmically smacked  in the face the past few days. It was The-Universe-Is-Pissed-At-Aly time, I guess. Of course that shit doesn't happen when you initially feel bad about the fucked up shit you've done. Ohhh no. It waits till things are going great, till you're carrying around happiness bubbles and are smiling at strangers and flirting with old guys to make their day. Then it's like hey, oh, btw...!FWAP! (yeah, that's the sound the Universe makes when it smacks you. fwap. in case you weren't aware.)

When did my life become a bad country song??

I tried toughing through life by not taking my meds for a few days. I wanted to prove to myself that I didn't need them, that I'm a fully capable, rational adult that can control her emotions and not sink into a bottomless pit when a blip happens. you can be addicted to a certain kind of sadness

....that was a terrible experiment.

It took three days. Not one, not two, but THREE. fucking. days. That's it. I couldn't even make it a week. It's like the minute the crazy pills weren't in my system my brain said BWAHAHAHA this is the moment I've been waiting for! ZOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM. (This would be my self esteem and mental clarity dropping. Like how my life has sound effects? I'm like a walking, talking Quentin Tarantino flik)

all these faerie tales are full of shit

Why do you make it so goddamn difficult to love you?